he should just be locked up so the tabloids can stop printing crap about him and because he is quite clearly a criminal[/quote:8343286b2d]
But that will defeat the whole purpose of Bill Drummond's latest and most successful stunt :-D
er, oops have a transcript by way of apology, and see why I didn't wanna post it!
Pete Doherty and the KLF
POSTED BY:: Jegsy
Date: Fri/10/2/06 17:13
The Samaritans have today recruited 600 extra staff to deal with an expected surge in calls as troubled fans come to terms with today's revelations about rocker and teen icon Pete Doherty. In a surprise press conference today, the men behind Doherty's career reveled themselves - and admitted that the Libertines, Babyshambles, the tales of drug use, the armed robberies and the affair with supermodel Kate Moss have all been part of one of the largest hoaxes in British history.
The men behind the scandal - Bill Drummond and Jimmy Cauty, who were themselves infamous popstars under the name The KLF - admitted how they plucked a young Buddy Holly impersonator Doherty from obscurity and made him a media darling. "It was a meant to be a quick stunt to show the frailties of our celbrity-obsessed culture," said Cauty, adding, "there are too many people who are famous despite their lack of talent, usefulness and basic intelligence. We wanted to do something that held a mirror up to that." Mr Drummond called Britain's pop-culture "sick" and said that although he regretted the hurt caused to Doherty's many fans, he hoped "this incident taught us all some important things".
In a prepared statement, the two men - famous for many other pop pranks, including the famous burning of GBP1million on a remote Scottish island - detailed how they manipulated the British Press into making Doherty an icon. Doherty - whose real name has now been revealed to be Trevor McDermott - was making a living as a part-time Buddy Holly impersonator in the Cornwall holiday circuit. He began a short-lived affair with the singer of a well known 80's rock band, and was introduced to Drummond and Cauty at a backstage party in London's West End. The men described how a drunken McDermott amused them with his slurred singing and frenetic dance movements, and how they then realised that this would be the perfect "dupe" for a plan they had been hatching for some time.
"The plan involved proving three theories we have about current British society," reads the statement. "The first is that in the so-called "alternative" scene, everybody is too scared of missing The Next Big Thing to worry about anything else." To prove this, some session musicians were provided to compose the rest of the "band", The Libertines, and rumours of exposive gigs were leaked to the media. "The gigs in question never actually took place, but we didn't have to worry about that. Soon the buzz around The Libertines was so frenetic, journalists were falling over themselves to claim to have been at the front of every single fictional gig." Within weeks, The Libertines were appearing on magazines and receiving record offers. Gigs sold out in minutes, while their first album "Up The Bracket" flew off shelves.
Feeling that their first point had been proved, Drummond and Cauty moved to their second theory: "We feel that our culture has become an enormous soap opera. We don't care what a person thinks, or creates, or contributes. We just care about what they do in their normal lives. Especially when it's something they shouldn't be doing."
To demonstrate this, the men co-ordinated a number of scandals. First was a robbery staged in the house of one of the band members. When this took place, McDermott (aka Doherty) was unknown outside of the alternative music scene. An incident of this calibre was sufficient, however, to catapult McDermott onto the front page of every major national tabloid. "One day we has just another singer, the next day he was 'Disgraced Celebrity Rocker', and he hasn't been out of the papers since". Further revelations about drug abuse and violence kept McDermott and The Libertines on the front pages for months.
One thing that took even Drummond and Cauty by surprise was the affair with model Kate Moss. "That was not something that we planned or had any involvement. Whether she knew about the hoax is something we are not party to. We have never had any contact with Miss Moss." However, this was the boost their project needed - where the drugs and crime had made McDermott a media sensation, the relationship with one of fashion's most famous women catapulted him into the world of true celebrity. "While we had not planned this, it certainly proved our point. There are many superior artists in the country today, but they never appear in Heat or The Sun, because they don't have the words 'boyfriend of Kate Moss' after their name."
Despite this boost, the project began running into a major setback for Drummond and Cauty. Just as they were preparing to enter the final phase of their scheme, Doherty decided that he wanted to part company with them, the fake band, and begin seriously recording music. He stopped all contact with the men, and threatened legal actions if any details were leaked to the press. "We were upset at the apparent failure of our grand project, and also at the monster we had created in Pete Doherty. Our third theorem - that 'If enough people say that a piece of s*** is a bar of gold, we'll believe it's a bar of gold' - seemed to have been beyond salvation. Fortunately, at that point Pete released the first Babyshambles album."
In the time since then, Drummond and Cauty have been locked in a vicious legal battle, which was eventually settled out of court by the discovery of a videotape showing McDermott singing "Peggy Sue" at a Butlin's in Devon. Publicly, McDermott still strongly denies all charges. How this affects the future career of Pete Doherty remains to be seen.
Besides being a total f*%kin wanker he is also a rather talentless musician! Were any of his bands even that successful? He's also in more than eighty grand of debt, so aswell as being a talentless wanker he is now also a broke talentless wanker. Nice state to be in.....me thinks not!
[quote:577be4c481="Chomsky"]I think it's ridiculous someone with so little talent and intelligence can be lauded with such praise by the devil spawn offspring that is the "respected music press".
Why can't he just overdose or something so we don't have to listen to this nonsense anymore. His antics are as uninteresting and pointless as his music.[/quote:577be4c481]
I know I will get slated for it, however, I love The Libertines and Baby Shambles but more especially I love the acoustic solo Peter Doherty. I think the music is something you either hate or are deeply affected by and love (which sounds silly and pretentious but that is the way I and many others feel about it).
I think hoping someone will overdose as Chomsky and many others (not only on here) have said is despicable. I know its probably a bit tongue in cheek, but wishing someone dead so you dont have to read about them is a bit much, and anyway wouldnt a death just spawn loads more nonsense, books, photos, albums etc.
PD is acting like an idiot, but then again dont all addicts to a greater or lesser extent? The trouble for him is, he is surrounded by a bunch of idiot addicts while trying to stay clean. I am sure that is not easy for anyone,but added to that he has the tabloids hounding him every day because they are all waiting for him to overdose and want to be the first with the news, at the moment he sells papers.
If he is charged and found guilty over these latest accusations, then he will be going to jail and probably for some considerable time, so he will disappear from the tabloids then and everyone will be happy. All his most supportive fans want is for him to sort himself out and be able to write and perform again, in his present state that is unlikely.
The best thing I ever saw in connection with this wannabe was his interview with Kirsty Wark. This is mainly because it provided yet another reason to watch Kirsty Wark for half an hour, were any more needed.
TBF this thread is being propagated by the people who don't like him... if you really want him to go away would it not be better to ignore him?
I think his 'antics' are indescribably balls and he does give the impression of bein a total moron but HE IS a fairly talented songwriter. The Libertines first Up the Bracket is a really good album with a pleathora of finely written tunes - a talentless moron could not have come up with such great melodies/hooks and lyrics imo
To say he's a talentless and unintellegent is lazy and ignorant. But to say he acts like a complete wanker is totally spot on.
[quote:06845f9c7a]Were any of his bands even that successful?[/quote:06845f9c7a]
Be it through hype, scandal or otherwise, it would be naive to suggest that the libertines and babyshambles were anything other than commercially successful
[quote:2a53e332ea] if you really want him to go away would it not be better to ignore him? [/quote:2a53e332ea]
Absolutely...now if you can only have a word with the media, newspapers etc etc.... so it's actually humanly possible to do so.
I'd love to see this evidence for his supposed 'intelligence'. Certainly the recent prison diaries in The Guardian suggested quite the opposite - he's clearly been convinced by the NME he's some sort of prophet, but his actual writing suggests a literary paper tiger.
As for the poetry, well...
I see paint-cracked walls stained with shite
Long long lock-up days
Cold lonely nights
And I think to myself ... what a wonderful world
I see men touching fists
Saying "watcha bruv"
Screams from below
Shit parcels from above
And I think to myself ...
I see my true love
On a Rimmel advert
[quote:ea1a278509="The Limelight"]Pete Doherty, talentless or not?
BABYSHAMBLES will be playing in the Spring & Airbrake on Wednesday 12th April - tickets going on sale this Friday from Katy Daly's and Ticketmaster. Why not come down on the night and decide then?[/quote:ea1a278509]
Wonderland are currently selling tickets saying its 14th April. What's up with that?
come on, the mans a clown.
who would pay money to see a busking junkie? For thats what he is, is he not?
i could go through Belfast, Dublin or Manchester etc any day and see it for free.
And you would go down well at the Babyshi-ttles gig. Bad attiude.
Angsty. Seems that way to me as you refer to me as 'spastic' a horrible and very morally offensive word. Thats just lovely for those here who have disabled loved ones. tut tut
As for that band and their gigs, they are an industry phase. I personally predict that Doherty will end up sleeping in a box looking even more like sh-ite than he already does - of course only once the bright lights fade and the fat cats get their cash turn and get sick of his junkie ways.
My best friend's brother has Down's Syndrome - he still uses the word spastic, so stop trying to take the moral highground, ryankozzi. Although it is obvious from your posts that you are a bit of a spastic.
"ive seen and heard enough in the media. his disgusting heroin smack my beatch up ways and foul mouthed gibberish. id bang his ex though."
Foul-mouthed gibberish? What age are you? 90? You may want to "bang" his ex, which itself is a derogatory and misogynistic reference, but she'd probably not want to be "banged" by you.
"And you would go down well at the Babyshi-ttles gig. Bad attiude.
Angsty? I'm not the one with near enough 99% negative contributions to Fastfude. Although you do remind me of the way I behaved on this board maybe six years ago, which to be frank, is embarassing.
I think Pete Doherty is a complete tube and I really do not like either the Libertines or Babyshambles but there are definitely a stack load of bands out there who are musically much much worse. I can listen to the music - it's okay *shrugs* reletively inoffensive.
And Pete Doherty's presence doesn't bother me that much. I just don't read about it much - I don't buy Heat or I skip past the articles in the paper. It's not so hard.
[quote:525000e9bf="gtm"]My best friend's brother has Down's Syndrome - he still uses the word spastic, so stop trying to take the moral highground, ryankozzi. Although it is obvious from your posts that you are a bit of a spastic. [/quote:525000e9bf]
Yeah but being a spastic (like Joey Deacon) isn't the same as being a mong(oloid).
[i:525000e9bf]Heavier than ewe and me!
One chromosome too many!
And he - wore a hat - and he - had a job - and he -
brought home the bacon, because - no-one knew-eeew-eeeew-oooOOOO
he was a Mongoloid, mogolOID[/i:525000e9bf]
etc etc etc
[quote:449c99e50e="Vegas"]John Lennon? Bob Dylan? Janis Joplin? Tim Buckley? Tim Hardin?
Outside of Dylan I'd love to know who's gonna pay to see the other 4? :lol:[/quote:449c99e50e]
Me.. at least Janis Joplin and Tim Buckley.
Or how's about Neil Young, Johnny Cash, Mars Volta (and At the Drive In), Rolling Stones, George Michael.
Just jokin about George there, but the point stands - complaining that a musician is rubbish cos they're a junkie is daft. As is getting riled up about a band who you've never seen because you find their lead singer's media presence to be annoying.
[quote:64776be5fb="tenrabbits"]... complaining that a musician is rubbish cos they're a junkie is daft... [/quote:64776be5fb]
You think so?
In an abstract sense, yes, an artist's personal life oughtn't to really impinge much on the music they present.
However that Pete Dogherty gimp clearly has an army of tabloid publicists making sure he's known in every household in Britain as the country's most bonkers on-the-edge wastrel. It's "what he's about", it's his "image" etc etc etc
Pop music is never just about chord progressions and bpms, it's about a whole cultural identity, a way to live ewer life.
Pete Dogherty shows us a way to be a complete tit.
Ergo, etc etc etc
The media interest in Doherty's antics is distressing in 2006.
There are many in the above lists I too would love to see but the privledge will never occur because they sadly bought the moronic sex, drugs and rock n roll idea. Idiots all! Tim Buckley - dead moron. Janis Joplin - dead moron. Johnny Thunders - dead moron. Sid Vicious - dead moron. The old saying Sex, Drugs and Rock n Roll sounds very glamourous. It forgets to add death but death comes attached every time.
To buy into this myth as late the the 2000s merely highlights Doherty's incapacity to do it on his own and openly exposes his creative redundancy, as well as the fact that he's not a very bright lad. The fact that this guy is an obvious imbecile yet still inspires media interest for doing nothing that should surprise or shock anyone by this stage, sadly reflects how such myths are still perpetuated in the mainstream.
Career's are dictated by the media not by talent. I'm sure musicians get busted all the time. But we only hear about 2 kinds of drug bust - those whose addictions give them more column inches than any song they ever wrote did and those whose career is in the toilet (pardon the pun) and get caught in possession of a bit of weed after a 'tip-off' to the police.
Meanwhile I'm bored and fancy buying a v-neck sweater and joining the local golf club. :(
[quote:8654ac4de1="Vegas"]Career's are dictated by the media not by talent. [/quote:8654ac4de1]
If you actually believe that then I guess you only listen to pop. Ah well.. you're missing out on a lot. You're also missing out on the fact that the libertines got to be big without the media you describe - they became well known thru playin lots of gigs to people who loved them.
As for the 'army of tabloid publicists' that doherty has feline.. well I don't think it's his choice.. he's just got a few screws loose and that sells a lot more papers than the sanitised, press trained pop 'artists' that we mostly get. You sound surprised that if you read a tabloid you'll get tabloid stories.
It is true though that the libertines managed to gain a cult following initially through word of mouth and great performances.
Desus still goes on about seein them as a support in the Limelight before up the bracket was released and he was blown away without having even heard of the band before the gig. To me its quite obvious that they had *something*
I agree with tenrabbits tho, if you want to find out what Pete Doherty's up to you go to www.fastfude.com where there will inevitably be a 5 page thread contrived and perpetuated by those who claim to despise him and are 'sick hearing of him'
If I wanna hear doherty I listen to Up the Bracket, and I'm not ashamed to say that I still really enjoy it.
I'm a news junkie, and so I noticed that apparently everyone seems to think that whatever he does is news....as witnessed in this latest case by the news bulletins, all the TV text services, and all the newspapers I read...including the local ones like the Irish News...let alone the music press.
So i disagree with you that it's easy to avoid him, Charlie....to the contrary, he was featured in every news outlet I was involved in reading or watching.
[quote:ca633ef4fa="tenrabbits"][quote:ca633ef4fa="Vegas"]Career's are dictated by the media not by talent. [/quote:ca633ef4fa]
If you actually believe that then I guess you only listen to pop. Ah well.. you're missing out on a lot. You're also missing out on the fact that the libertines got to be big without the media you describe[/quote:ca633ef4fa]
And were kept 'big' by the media I describe despite minimal output and a blatant disregard for the fact that nowhere near enough people were as interested as both The Libertines and the London Media portrayed.
This is old ground. As are all things Doherty. Lock! Lock!