1. avatar Orzo
    Examples:

    1. Snap: "I'm serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer"

    2. Any band that resorts to "NANANANANANANANNA" more than once on an album. (i.e. Kaiser Chiefs.)

    3. Your own lyrics? I'm guessing there's a fair share of awful lyrics you've listened to or sang over the years.
  2. avatar feline1
    Well the Worst Lyric of All Time Ever in the History of Pop Music was voted as

    "...and where there used to be some shops,
    is where the snipers sometimes hide..."

    on The Lebanon by The Human League

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QEsRYkRpySY


    As parodied in Viz with "The Human League in Space" where Phil and the Girls saved the world with a pop concert.

    Sadly now they have all drowned in Sheffield so that's the end of that :cry:
  3. avatar burdie
    That feckin Riannha song unbrella must have the worst lyrics of the year so far, unberella eh eh eh, muck
  4. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    I'm afraid of the dark
    Especially when i'm in a park
    And theres no-one else around
    Ooh I get the shivers

    I don't want to see a ghost
    It's the sight I fear most
    I'd rather have a piece of toast
    And watch the evening news

    Life oh Life ooooh Life oh Life
    doodoo doo

    etc.

    [size=7:e2d43a41f7]Doesn't look as bad when it's written down :shock: [/size:e2d43a41f7]
  5. avatar greensleevesisgod
    No they are still awful written down.
  6. avatar ShowYourBones
    I find these lines by the Twang hilarious:

    "I've godda find my phone to tell 'er
    Ahhh, maybe even write you a love letter."
  7. avatar Numbnut Sounds
    Can i just go with, (insert specific type of...) Metal lyrics..

    [quote:a5781a9d57]Full the moon and midnight sky
    Through the dark they ride
    Warriors of forever will sacrifice the night

    One for all and all for one
    The future time has come
    Faces filled with torment
    Your heart beats like a drum

    Never will you look back again
    You'll fight on 'til the end
    Together we will live on
    Forever more...

    In this land we have defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we are defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we have defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we are defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    Flash of steel in the mid-day sun
    The battle has begun
    Blood spills all around us but still we carry on

    No mercy we will show to them
    The white flag shall be raised
    We'll fight for our freedom
    Ride towards this evil place

    We all stand until the end allegiance to this game

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    Sun set in the western sky
    The battle's almost done
    The victory will be glorious
    Our enemies are gone

    We all stand until the end allegiance to this game

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    [Solo]

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule [3x][/quote:a5781a9d57]
  8. avatar Tele
    From Methodman's "Cereal Killer". I put my favourite bits in bold.

    "Yo, fuck knockin, kick the door, evict the four
    Yell out, "It's a stick-up, hit the floor!"
    You [b:dd2903a171]fish cake niggaz[/b:dd2903a171], stay lippin off
    Did your mama name you, or Mrs. Paul's?
    Battlin session, what's up with it?
    I talk like I walk with a fucked up pivot
    Niggaz scream out, "It's just us bitches!"
    "Don't shoot," out the phone booth
    I aim at your party, hit the wrong group
    "Happy birth..." oooh, ooh ooh ooh!
    [b:dd2903a171]Niggaz done snapped, runnin hunchback
    Duckin, brick walls get thumbtacked[/b:dd2903a171]
    So run laps, 'fore I body you
    Bust out the sides, like karate shoes
    Doc, turned velcro when night falls
    Central Park joggers, wear bright clothes
    Tai-Bo five flows
    Lizard, Centipede, Snake - I'm a KILLER!"

    There's also a bit where he talks about pissing on people's car seats.
  9. avatar 3cigarettes
    [quote:1790a50c7d="Numbnut Sounds"]Can i just go with, (insert specific type of...) Metal lyrics..

    [quote:1790a50c7d]Full the moon and midnight sky
    Through the dark they ride
    Warriors of forever will sacrifice the night

    One for all and all for one
    The future time has come
    Faces filled with torment
    Your heart beats like a drum

    Never will you look back again
    You'll fight on 'til the end
    Together we will live on
    Forever more...

    In this land we have defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we are defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we have defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we are defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    Flash of steel in the mid-day sun
    The battle has begun
    Blood spills all around us but still we carry on

    No mercy we will show to them
    The white flag shall be raised
    We'll fight for our freedom
    Ride towards this evil place

    We all stand until the end allegiance to this game

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    Sun set in the western sky
    The battle's almost done
    The victory will be glorious
    Our enemies are gone

    We all stand until the end allegiance to this game

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule

    [Solo]

    In this land we've defended from all things dark and cruel
    Now we're defenseless in a land where dragons rule [3x][/quote:1790a50c7d][/quote:1790a50c7d]

    These are amazing lyrics :lol: :lol: :lol:
  10. avatar trixie sidebottom
    Walking slowly down the hall
    Faster than a cannon ball

    (Oasis)

    Got to write a classic
    Got to write it in an attic

    (Adrian Gurvitz)

    I've been to paradise
    But I've never been to me

    (Charlene)
  11. avatar rentaghost
    that charlene song makes me wince just thinking about it. truly awful.
  12. avatar comprachio
    anything by Live...

    I once split up with a girl because of an argument about Live.
  13. avatar Pete
    [quote:4af7a09b36="comprachio"]I once split up with a girl because of an argument about Live.[/quote:4af7a09b36]

    Sounds like she was right to dump you :wink:
  14. avatar ratherfunkychemicaljunky
    "Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak, [b:cc0e2f3d57]somewhere in this town[/b:cc0e2f3d57]"

    Not cringeworthy or anything like, but surely common sense would've pointed to the jail.
  15. avatar nonlogic liam
    Pretty much every lyric by the cranberries or Oasis.

    e.g

    "Just My Imagination"

    There was a game we used to play
    We would hit the town on Friday night
    And stay in bed until Sunday
    We used to be so free
    We were living for the love we had and
    Living not for reality

    It was just my imagination [x3]

    There was a time I used to pray
    I have always kept my faith in love
    It's the greatest thing from the man above
    The game I used to play
    I've always put my cards upon the table
    Let it never be said that I'd be unstable

    It was just my imagination [x3]

    There is a game I like to play
    I like to hit the town on Friday night
    And stay in bed until Sunday
    We'll always be this free
    We will be living for the love we have
    Living not for reality

    It's not my imagination [x3]
    Not my [x18]

    [size=18:a2ae4a9964]OR[/size:a2ae4a9964]

    "Bone heads bank holiday lyrics"

    You know I need a little break to get away for a holiday
    So I can see the sun
    'Cause in the sun they say it's fun
    If you get some

    Well I could take a train
    Or a boat
    Or an aeroplane
    Or I could steal a car
    'Cause in a car you can go far
    It just depends what kind of car you are
    la la la la la la la la la la la
    What kind of car you are
    la la la la la la la la la la la

    I met a funny looking girl on a crowded beach in Spain
    Her name was Avaline
    She said she came to Spain
    To have a good time
    But she was with her mum who had a face like a nun in pain
    She said her name was Dot
    She didn't half talk a lot
    I couldn't tell if she was mad or not
    la la la la la la la la la la la
    Mad or not
    la la la la la la la la la la la

    But don't you know
    I should have stayed in England
    At my polluted beach
    With all my special friends
    Don't you know
    I should have stayed in England
    With my big house
    And my big car
    And all my friends there at the bar
    la la la

    Well I need a little break to get away for a holiday
    So I can see the sun
    'Cause in the sun they say it's fun
    If you get some

    Well I could take a train
    Or a boat
    Or an aeroplane
    Or I could steal a car
    'Cause in a car you can go far
    It just depends what kind of car you are
    la la la la la la la la la la la
    What kind of car you are
    la la la la la la la la la la la



    [size=24:a2ae4a9964]AWFUL!!![/size:a2ae4a9964]
    Last edited on , 1 times in total.
  16. avatar comprachio
    less of it pete. We had a big row, i didn't realise how much the band 'meant' to her. Things were said. Hearts were broken.
  17. avatar T Entertainment
    I never shirk a chance to post this:

    Famine Lyrics
    Artist(Band):Sinead O'Connor


    OK, I want to talk about Ireland
    Specifically I want to talk about the "famine"
    About the fact that there never really was one
    There was no "famine"
    See Irish people were only allowed to eat potatoes
    All of the other food
    Meat fish vegetables
    Were shipped out of the country under armed guard
    To England while the Irish people starved
    And then on the middle of all this
    They gave us money not to teach our children Irish
    And so we lost our history
    And this is what I think is still hurting me
    See we're like a child that's been battered
    Has to drive itself out of it's head because it's frightened
    Still feels all the painful feelings
    But they lose contact with the memory
    And this leads to massive self-destruction
    alcoholism, drug adiction
    All desperate attempts at running
    And in it's worst form
    Becomes actual killing
    And if there ever is gonna be healing
    There has to be remembering
    And then grieving
    So that there then can be forgiving
    There has to be knowledge and understanding
    All the lonely people
    where do they all come from
    An American army regulation Says you mustn't kill more than 10% of a nation
    'Cos to do so causes permanent "psychological damage"
    It's not permanent but they didn't know that
    Anyway during the supposed "famine"
    We lost a lot more than 10% of our nation
    Through deaths on land or on ships of emigration
    But what finally broke us was not starvation
    but it's use in the controlling of our education
    Schools go on about "Black 47"
    On and on about "The terrible famine"
    But what they don't say is in truth
    There really never was one
    (Excuse me)
    All the lonely people
    (I'm sorry, excuse me)
    Where do they all come from
    (that I can tell you in one word)
    All the lonely people
    where do they all belong
    So let's take a look shall we
    The highest statistics of child abuse in the EEC
    And we say we're a Christian country
    But we've lost contact with our history
    See we used to worship God as a mother
    We're sufferin from post traumatic stress disorder
    Look at all our old men in the pubs
    Look at all our young people on drugs
    We used to worship God as a mother
    Now look at what we're doing to each other
    We've even made killers of ourselves
    The most child-like trusting people in the Universe
    And this is what's wrong with us
    Our history books the parent figures lied to us
    I see the Irish
    As a race like a child
    That got itself basned in the face
    And if there ever is gonna be healing
    There has to be remembering
    And then grieving
    So that there then can be forgiving
    There has to be knowledge and understanding
    All the lonely people
    Where do they all come from
    All the lonely people
    Where do they all come from
  18. avatar whipchorus
    WID DERE TANKS AND DERE BOMBS AND DERE BOMBS AN DERE GUNS
  19. avatar The Grace Jones
    How much innocence has the world lost :

    [i:59eac79928]Everybody screamed when I kissed the teacher
    And they must have thought they dreamed when I kissed the teacher
    All my friends at school
    They had never seen the teacher blush, he looked like a fool
    Nearly petrified 'cos he was taken by surprise
    When I kissed the teacher
    Couldn't quite believe his eyes, when I kissed the teacher
    My whole class went wild
    As I held my breath, the world stood still, but then he just smiled
    I was in the seventh heaven when I kissed the teacher
    One of these days
    Gonna tell him I dream of him every night
    One of these days
    Gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson alright
    I was in a trance when I kissed the teacher
    Suddenly I took the chance when I kissed the teacher
    Leaning over me, he was trying to explain the laws of geometry
    And I couldn't help it, I just had to kiss the teacher
    One of these days
    Gonna tell him I dream of him every night
    One of these days
    Gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson alright
    What a crazy day, when I kissed the teacher
    All my sense had flown away when I kissed the teacher
    My whole class went wild
    As I held my breath, the world stood still, but then he just smiled
    I was in the seventh heaven when I kissed the teacher
    (I wanna hug, hug, hug him)
    When I kissed the teacher
    (I wanna hug, hug him) ...[/i:59eac79928]
  20. avatar xconorx
    The entire lyric of Clawfinger's "nigger". The sentiment is fine but for fvck sake the lyrics are that of a 9 yr old.
  21. avatar I'mDead
    "I suppose a rock's outta the question?" Thank you Def Leppard

    "Give me somethin to break, how 'bout your fookin face". Cheers Fred Durst.

    "Press be askin, do I care for sodomy, I dont know, yeah, probably". Mmmkay Robbie.
  22. avatar willy_no1
    "..and I met a girl, she asked me my name, i told her what it was.." - razorshite
  23. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    the lyrics to Bohemian Rhapsody are pretty balls.
  24. avatar Tele
    [quote:7a36afe371="The Grace Jones"]How much innocence has the world lost :

    [i:7a36afe371]Everybody screamed when I kissed the teacher
    And they must have thought they dreamed when I kissed the teacher
    All my friends at school
    They had never seen the teacher blush, he looked like a fool
    Nearly petrified 'cos he was taken by surprise
    When I kissed the teacher
    Couldn't quite believe his eyes, when I kissed the teacher
    My whole class went wild
    As I held my breath, the world stood still, but then he just smiled
    I was in the seventh heaven when I kissed the teacher
    One of these days
    Gonna tell him I dream of him every night
    One of these days
    Gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson alright
    I was in a trance when I kissed the teacher
    Suddenly I took the chance when I kissed the teacher
    Leaning over me, he was trying to explain the laws of geometry
    And I couldn't help it, I just had to kiss the teacher
    One of these days
    Gonna tell him I dream of him every night
    One of these days
    Gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson alright
    What a crazy day, when I kissed the teacher
    All my sense had flown away when I kissed the teacher
    My whole class went wild
    As I held my breath, the world stood still, but then he just smiled
    I was in the seventh heaven when I kissed the teacher
    (I wanna hug, hug, hug him)
    When I kissed the teacher
    (I wanna hug, hug him) ...[/i:7a36afe371][/quote:7a36afe371]

    Abba at their physical peak.
  25. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    Oh yes and basically all of Razorlight's lyrics.
  26. avatar tenrabbits
    I remember hearing this song that had some sh[b:60504b3bf7][/b:60504b3bf7]ite about 'bored wi belfast' in it.. christ that was woeful. Anyone got the lyrics to that? I've mentally blocked them I think..
    Last edited on , 1 times in total.
  27. avatar The Grace Jones
    Would be good crack if Tatu covered it.

    Abba, that is, not the TPO.

    "[i:973f517d52]Bored With Belfast[/i:973f517d52]" as covered by Daphne and Celeste fronting Less than Jake would be smashing though.
    Last edited on , 1 times in total.
  28. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    [mongness]

    [quote:871cfd66b7]"..and I met a girl, she asked me my name, i told her what it was.."[/quote:871cfd66b7]

    what song is this? i know its really really obvious but it's doing my head in!!

    :oops:

    [/mongness]
  29. avatar tenrabbits
    That avril lavigne one about the ladyboy was pretty bad.

    "He was a ladyboy.. she said 'see you ladyboy'"

    Fair enough tho.. you don't want your bf takin yr stuff LOL!1
  30. avatar my-angel-rocks
    [quote:de42ccda01="Dirty Stevie Grizz"][mongness]

    [quote:de42ccda01]"..and I met a girl, she asked me my name, i told her what it was.."[/quote:de42ccda01]

    what song is this? i know its really really obvious but it's doing my head in!![/quote:de42ccda01]

    Razorlight - Somewhere Else

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/pressoffice/pressreleases/stories/2007/05_may/04/lyrics.shtml
  31. avatar thefatson
    I still haven't stopped laughing since I figured out the Blue song "All rise" was about a courtroom drama.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HhXcrJMZXY
  32. avatar my-angel-rocks
    Wow, and excessive use of vocoder to hide the fact none of them could hit the notes
  33. avatar Zosofan
    Boneheads bankholiday is supposed to be a bit shite...its a piss take song. Fuck sake it's only a B-side and Oasis had B-sides that were better than most bands singles. Death to all who slag oasis. Noel Forever!!!
  34. avatar MSB Mastering
    Heard on the radio:

    "I couldn't live without my phone,
    but you don't even have a home..."

    I'd love to know who this was by so I can injure him or her
  35. avatar I'mDead
    Lest we forget:

    'No-no, no-no-no-no, no-no-no-no, no-no there's no limits'
  36. avatar my-angel-rocks
    Techno techno techno techno
  37. avatar willy_no1
    lets not forget snoop dogg's lines in the dr.dre song "fuck you"

    "..take that bitch home and give her a bone then give her the number to my cellular phone.."

    also in the same song:

    "..and if im going too far, i take it out and wipe it off then put it back up and keep going.."
  38. avatar 3cigarettes
    50 cent - "I love you like a fat kid love cake"

    [quote:1b9426ffa0="ShowYourBones"]I find these lines by the Twang hilarious:

    "I've godda find my phone to tell 'er
    Ahhh, maybe even write you a love letter."[/quote:1b9426ffa0]

    Yeah, sort of, still, it's probably one of the best songs of the summer so far.
    Last edited on , 1 times in total.
  39. avatar BOOZEHOUND
    [quote:a783f54ab3="MSB Mastering"]Heard on the radio:

    "I couldn't live without my phone,
    but you don't even have a home..."

    I'd love to know who this was by so I can injure him or her[/quote:a783f54ab3]

    it's mel c..'if that were me'.

    but she WAS a spice girl I suppose...and who could forget ''i'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want!''


    shooting....in my opinion.
  40. avatar rentaghost
    words cannot express.....


    "Blue (Da Ba De)"

    Yo listen up here's a story
    About a little guy that lives in a blue world
    And all day and all night and everything he sees
    Is just blue like him inside and outside
    Blue his house with a blue little window
    And a blue corvette
    And everything is blue for him and hisself
    And everybody around
    Cos he ain't got nobody to listen to

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I have a blue house with a blue window.
    Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
    Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
    I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
    Blue are the people here that walk around,
    Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
    Blue are the words I say and what I think.
    Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I have a blue house with a blue window.
    Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
    Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
    I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
    Blue are the people here that walk around,
    Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
    Blue are the words I say and what I think.
    Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    Inside and outside blue his house
    With the blue little window and a blue corvette
    And everything is blue for him and hisself
    And everybody around cause he aint got
    Nobody to listen to

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I'm blue (if I was green I would die)
  41. avatar racecarisracecarbackwards
    [quote:5d9166ba22="rentaghost"]words cannot express.....


    "Blue (Da Ba De)"

    Yo listen up here's a story
    About a little guy that lives in a blue world
    And all day and all night and everything he sees
    Is just blue like him inside and outside
    Blue his house with a blue little window
    And a blue corvette
    And everything is blue for him and hisself
    And everybody around
    Cos he ain't got nobody to listen to

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I have a blue house with a blue window.
    Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
    Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
    I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
    Blue are the people here that walk around,
    Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
    Blue are the words I say and what I think.
    Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I have a blue house with a blue window.
    Blue is the colour of all that I wear.
    Blue are the streets and all the trees are too.
    I have a girlfriend and she is so blue.
    Blue are the people here that walk around,
    Blue like my corvette, it's standing outside.
    Blue are the words I say and what I think.
    Blue are the feelings that live inside me.

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    Inside and outside blue his house
    With the blue little window and a blue corvette
    And everything is blue for him and hisself
    And everybody around cause he aint got
    Nobody to listen to

    I'm blue da ba dee da ba die...

    I'm blue (if I was green I would die)[/quote:5d9166ba22]

    I loved the myth that the original lyric was "I'm blue, I was beat up and died" and "I'm in need of a guy".

    I'd say Babyraper by Gwar has to be the worst lyrics I've heard ever. They're so wrong I'm not even gonna post them here.
  42. avatar greensleevesisgod
    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me

    I'm lazy when I'm lovin', I'm lazy when I play
    I'm lazy with my girlfriend a thousand times a day
    I'm lazy when I'm speaking, I'm lazy when I walk
    I'm lazy when I'm dancin' and I'm lazy when I talk

    I open up my mouth, it comes rushin' out
    Nothin', doin' nadda, never, how you like me now?
    Wouldn't it be mad, wouldn't it be fine
    Lazy, lucky lady, dancin', lovin' all the time

    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me

    Some folks they got money an' some folks lives are sweet
    Some folks make decisions an' some folks clean the streets, now
    Imagine what it feels like, imagine how it sounds
    Imagine life is perfect an' everything works out

    No tears are fallin' from my eyes
    I'm keepin' all the pain inside
    Now don't you wanna live with me?
    I'm lazy as a man can be!

    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me

    Imagine there's a girlfriend, imagine there's a job
    Imagine there's an answer, imagine there's a God
    Imagine I'm a Devil, imagine I'm a Saint
    Lazy money, lazy sexy, lazy outta space!

    No tears are fallin' from my eyes
    I'm keepin' all the pain inside
    Now don't you wanna live with me?
    I'm lazy as a man can be!

    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me

    Lazy when I work, lazy on the bed
    Screamin' all you like, but it only fades away
    I'm lazy when I'm prayin', lazy on the job
    Got a lazy mind, a lazy eye, a lazy lazy father

    Hard men, hard lives
    Hard keepin' it all inside
    Good times, good God
    I'm so lazy I almost stop!

    *cough*

    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me

    I-I-I-I'm wicked and I'm lazy
    Ooooh, don't you wanna save me
  43. avatar rentaghost
    bluddy hell
    'blue' and 'lazy' are the [i:bbbb5232b6]SAME SONG[/i:bbbb5232b6] :shock:

    that has me right spooked now, so it does.
  44. avatar NaomiS
    gotta say i agree with nonlogic liam on the other page there
    and im a big fan of The Cranberries!
    but i think some of their lyrics are quite funny

    like the one about having a cup of tea!
  45. avatar NaomiS
    yes i also agree with who ever said Razorlight
    all that commerical stuff can be complete bullshit
  46. avatar Amz
    not necessarily the worst, but Word magazine have a list of the most, well, lyrics not in the best taste like:

    Prince: Sister

    "i was only 16 but i guess that's no excuse/ my sister was 32, lovely and loose/ She don't wear no underwear/ She says it only gets in her hair/ And it's got a funny way of stoppin' the juice/ My sister never made love to anyone else but me"...hum

    or

    Peter Selelrs & Sophia Loren: Goodness Gracious Me
    "I rememebr that with on jab/ of my needle in the punjab/ how I cleared up beriberi/ and the dreaded dysentery"


    But for worst lyrics... U2 Elevation anybody?
  47. avatar Redfin
    "I love it when you call, I love it when you call, I love when you call but you never call at all"

    (backing singers) "he loves it when you call, he loves it when you call"

    utter utter shiite
  48. avatar ratherfunkychemicaljunky
    [quote:39521919c9="Redfin"]"I love it when you call, I love it when you call, I love when you call but you never call at all"

    (backing singers) "he loves it when you call, he loves it when you call"

    utter utter shiite[/quote:39521919c9]

    Could never understand why that song sounds so happy when it seems to be about being rejected :?
  49. avatar Gavin McKay Fan
    Artist: David Bowie
    Song: When I'm five

    When I'm five
    I will wash my face me hands all by myself.
    When I'm five
    I will chew and spit tobacco like my grandfather Jones
    cause I'm only four and five is far away.

    When I'm five
    I will read the magazines in mummy's drawer.
    When I'm five
    I will walk behind the soldiers in the May Day parade
    cause I'm only four and grown-ups walk too fast.

    Yesterday was horrid day, cause Raymond kicked my shin,
    And mummy says if I am good, she'll let me go to school in August.
    Daddy shouted loud at mummy and I dropped my toast at breakfast,
    And I laughed when Bonzo licked my face, because it tickled.
    I wonder why my daddy cries and how I wish that I was nearly five.

    When I'm five
    I will catch a butterfly and eat it and I wont be sick.
    When I'm five
    I will jump in puddles, laugh in church and marry my mum,
    And I'll let my daddy do the washing-up.

    If I close one eye, the people on that side can't see me.
    I get headaches in the morning and I rode on Freddie's tricycle,
    And everywhere was funny, when I ran down to the sweetshop.
    Then I fell and bleeded-up my knee and everybody soppied me.

    I saw a photograph of Jesus and I asked him if he'd make me five.
    I saw a photograph of Jesus and I asked him if he'd make me five.
    When I'm five
    When I'm five
    When I'm oh...
  50. avatar tinpot anto
    That's genius, shut up.

    Most of Prince's lyrics are decidedly keek, though he makes up for it through classness in every other area.

    "She had a pocket full of horses,
    Trojans, and some of them used"


    EEEEUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!

    That's not a "Fast Woman" it's a crack whore - run, Prince, run!!!!
  51. avatar ShowYourBones
    [quote:c4a61ebb24="3cigarettes"]
    Yeah, sort of, still, it's probably one of the best songs of the summer so far.[/quote:c4a61ebb24]

    I beg to differ, I think its a horrendous song, talking over a Stone Roses-esque melody does nothing whatsoever for me. The lyrics are terrible, the singing is terrible and their stage presence appears to be terrible.
  52. avatar sheriffjohnstone
    [quote:49f4be6d65="tinpot anto"]That's genius, shut up.

    Most of Prince's lyrics are decidedly keek, though he makes up for it through classness in every other area.

    "She had a pocket full of horses,
    Trojans, and some of them used"


    EEEEUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!

    That's not a "Fast Woman" it's a crack whore - run, Prince, run!!!![/quote:49f4be6d65]

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
  53. avatar 3cigarettes
    [quote:0f184a62a3="ShowYourBones"][quote:0f184a62a3="3cigarettes"]
    Yeah, sort of, still, it's probably one of the best songs of the summer so far.[/quote:0f184a62a3]

    I beg to differ, I think its a horrendous song, talking over a Stone Roses-esque melody does nothing whatsoever for me. The lyrics are terrible, the singing is terrible and their stage presence appears to be terrible.[/quote:0f184a62a3]

    Differ all you want man.
    Last edited on , 1 times in total.
  54. avatar Steven Dedalus
    When I was a young boy,
    My father took me into the city
    To see a marching band.

    He said, "Son when you grow up,
    would you be the savior of the broken,
    the beaten and the damned?"
    He said "Will you defeat them,
    your demons, and all the non-believers,
    the plans that they have made?"
    "Because one day I'll leave you,
    A phantom to lead you in the summer,
    To join The Black Parade."

    When I first heard that, I could only assume it was a joke.

    Obviously I was wrong.
  55. avatar Osama Bin Rockin'
    M.O.D. - Spandex Enormity

    Waiting here on line
    Suddenly from behind
    She's still a block away
    Why'd it have to be today
    Now what do I see
    She recognizes me
    She hugs and squeezes me
    She's the Spandex Enormity

    She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat
    Then she yells is this trick or treat
    It's too late she asks me for a date
    Before I'd f*ck I'd rather masturbate
    Spandex, Spandex Enormity
    A beast sent from Hell to plague me with misery

    What a f*cking beast
    Her @ss alone would be a feast
    And her love drippings
    Contained a stench of rotted yeast
    The show must go on
    It's the end of me
    Taking up the whole front row
    It's the Spandex Enormity

    She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat
    Then she yells is this trick or treat
    It's too late she asks me for a date
    Before I'd f*ck I'd rather masturbate
    Spandex, Spandex Enormity
    A beast sent from hell to plague me with misery

    As we were walking off stage
    You're waiting to come back
    She's got a back stage pass
    Oh no
    I hide my head
    The sight of you I dread
    Her chubby little fingers grab my @ss
    Don't talk to me, talk to Nick, talk to Nick
    Why does it always have to be me
    You f*cking fat b1tch
    I've had enough of you
    Take your blubber buns and leave
    She left here in tears
    Followed by her rear
    I could not help she's fat

    She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat
    Then she yells is this trick or treat
    It's too late she asks me for a date
    Before I'd f*ck I'd rather masturbate
    Spandex, Spandex Enormity
    A beast sent from Hell to plague me with misery

    They have worse, I just couldn't find them :roll:
  56. avatar my-angel-rocks
    "Three words to the whack, step yourself back
    Just gettin' down, and you then you're givin' no slack
    Like a Burger King with a sack of Big Macs
    We're throwin' down with the radical sacks"

    As much as I love the song, the lyrics are just terrible
  57. avatar mcflymo
    Most pop / rock bands lyrics are meaningless drivel.
    When they are 'meaningful' and 'deep' they're often even worse.
  58. avatar gl2200
    The entire lyrics to 'Like A Rolling Stone' = mawkish doggerel.
  59. avatar Steven Dedalus
    [quote:c5371d2a5a="gl2200"]The entire lyrics to 'Like A Rolling Stone' = mawkish doggerel.[/quote:c5371d2a5a]

    dear lord! Surely you jest? Or perhaps just being provocative? (in which case, it worked....)

    Ok, some of the verses and pretty iffy, but the chorus is amazing!
  60. avatar ginpromo
    in case we get famished before dinner
  61. avatar MSB Mastering
    "If I stay there will be trouble
    If I go it will be double..."

    Seems like an easy choice to me...
  62. avatar Kingnez
    weyyyyyyyyyyyy eyyyyyyyyyyyoooooooo baby
    i wana knowwwwohoh will you be my girl

    5678
    weyyyyyyyyyyyy eyyyyyyyyyyyoooooooo baby
    i wana knowwwwohoh will you be my girl
  63. avatar gl2200
    [quote:2aca553461="Steven Dedalus"]Ok, some of the verses and pretty iffy, but the chorus is amazing![/quote:2aca553461]

    If you don't mind terminally mixed metaphors...
  64. avatar domhnall
    Fat boy
    On a diet
    Don't try it
    I'll jack you' ass
    like a looter in a riot
  65. avatar freakyJ
    My first post!
    Brain fried tonight through misuse
    Through misuse, through misuse
    You can't avoid static abuse
    Abuse, abuse

    Without these pills you're let loose
    You're let loose, you're let loose
    Take off, get out, no excuse
    No excuse, no excuse

    What's that coming over the hill
    Is it a monster? Is it a monster?
    What's that coming over the hill
    Is it a monster? Is it a monster?
    What's that coming over the hill
    Is it a monster? Is it a monster?
    What's that coming over the hill?

    Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out
    It seeps out, it seeps out
    Face down, home town looks so grey
    Looks so grey, looks so grey

    Convexed you bend, twist and shout
    Twist and shout, twist and shout
    Stand up brush off get moving
    Get moving, get moving

    What's that coming over the hill
    Is it a monster? Is it a monster?
    (x4)

    Face down, home town, face down, home town
    Face down, home town, it looks so grey
    (x4)

    What's that coming over the hill
    Is it a monster? Is it a monster?
    (x4)
  66. avatar The enfant terrible
    Songs which are shit in their entirety in no particular order

    MCR - The Black Parade
    The Wildhearts - Sick of Drugs
    Kate Bush - Baboshka

    Lyrics so shit the song is great

    Richard Harris - MacArthur Park
    Prince - Gett Off
  67. avatar The enfant terrible
    [quote:9ab4b0b90e="Kingnez"]weyyyyyyyyyyyy eyyyyyyyyyyyoooooooo baby
    i wana knowwwwohoh will you be my girl

    5678
    weyyyyyyyyyyyy eyyyyyyyyyyyoooooooo baby
    i wana knowwwwohoh will you be my girl[/quote:9ab4b0b90e]

    the fat scandinavian goat herder rave version sucks but the original rock and roll version is pretty good and the lyrics are pretty standard 50's rock and roll ones so it ain't right to put it on this list.
  68. avatar BOOZEHOUND
    '' ah well everybody's heard, about the bird!
    well it's a bird bird bird, yes the bird is the word
    yeah it's a bird bird bird etc etc....''
  69. avatar kasey
    "My humps, my humps
    my lovely lady lumps
    check it out"
  70. avatar racecarisracecarbackwards
    GWAR

    "Baby Raper"

    Babyraper, sperm creator
    Hulking, brutish masturbator
    Babyraper, emasculator
    Fleshy flap valve navigator
    Never leave me,
    Babyraper
    Melted cum ejaculator
    Spackled filth evaporator
    High colonic spackulator the
    Babyraper the Babyraper
    My quest for sex consumes all my life
    Being a god I do what i like I know it hurts you when I fuck a child
    Cum-sumed with cumming I've simply gone wild
    Drinking and drowning in lakes full of lust
    I'll still jerk off even when I cum dust
    My sex is my hatred
    My penis a tool
    My balls are imploding I'm playing the fool
    My butt crack is folding
    The crap that it's holding I heap it all over the stool
    Oh, Babyraper I'm the fucking
    Babyraper I'm the guy who stiffed the waiter
    Mangled public flagellator
    Turgid bowel exaggerator
    Fleshy flap-valved gladiator


    Graph.
  71. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    [quote:bdf6a18721]
    Just say you don't know
    you don't know
    you say you don't know
    you don't know
    ohhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhhh ohhhhhhhhhh
    BEFORE I FALL TO PIECES
    OR SOMETHING[/quote:bdf6a18721]

    and they get to headline Tennents Vital
  72. avatar spirit of division
    "Dragostea Din Tea"
    English Lyrics Translation:

    Ma-ia-hii
    Ma-ia-huu
    Ma-ia-hoo
    Ma-ia-haha
    Hello, greetings, it’s me, an outlaw,
    I ask you, my love, to accept happiness.
    Hello, hello, it’s me, Picasso,
    I sent you a beep, and I’m brave,
    But you should know that I’m not asking for anything from you.

    You want to leave but you don’t want don’t want to take me, don’t want don’t want to take me, don’t want don’t want don’t want to take me.
    Your face and the love from the linden trees, And I remember your eyes.

    I call you, to tell you what I feel right now, Hello, my love, it’s me, your happiness.
    Hello, hello, it’s me again, Picasso,
    I sent you a beep, and I’m brave,
    But you should know that I’m not asking for anything from you.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwVxrIO_A9s

    ha
  73. avatar The enfant terrible
    there's no fucking way that's what those lyrics mean. It's all about how life is a razorblade and some guys have the sense to wear metal boots or something.
  74. avatar frajam
    Razorlight

    'I met a girl
    She asked me my name
    I told her what it is'

    Exciting i know
  75. avatar The enfant terrible
    That razorlight song is such a load of shite, he sings those lines like they reveal something about the human condition that only he has ever clocked. I hate razorlight lyrics, biggest load of platitudes outside of a moonies meeting. What about:

    Prince - Gett Off.

    Prince: "here we are now back at my crib, what do you want to eat?"
    Girl: "Ribs."
    Prince: "Sorry I don't have ribs."

    Of course you don't Prince, you had them removed so you could give yourself a blowjob.
  76. avatar p0d
    'I say what what, in the butt'
  77. avatar Dirty Stevie Grizz
    thats your favourite song that is.
  78. avatar babyknowsbest
    [quote:aa93503177="p0d"]'I say what what, in the butt'[/quote:aa93503177]
    Oh Kay?
  79. avatar Mickeycolensoparade
    He was boy, she was a girl
    can I make it any more obvious?

    ..........well yes, you could Avril.

    He was a punk, she did ballet
    What more can I say?

    ...................a lot more..
  80. avatar The enfant terrible
    That's about me so it is. I don't know how avril lavigne know's about me but I guess she must.
  81. avatar gl2200
    [quote:ada1b0eb6d="Mickeycolensoparade"]He was boy, she was a girl
    can I make it any more obvious?

    ..........well yes, you could Avril.

    He was a punk, she did ballet
    What more can I say?

    ...................a lot more..[/quote:ada1b0eb6d]

    Is there insufficient data for you to even make a wild assed guess at what possible situation could arise between two such people?
  82. avatar Shane
    "...shining, shimmering, [b:6a958c9e74]splendid[/b:6a958c9e74]
    tell me, princess, now [b:6a958c9e74]when did[/b:6a958c9e74]..."

    Oh, JE-SUS. :shock:
  83. avatar palrub
    local bands?

    cannae remember the name but i recall a frontpage gig aeons ago with a 3piece emo outfit - not entirely dreadful but something stuck;

    'i wanna hold you like a flower hose, the power in my grasp. feel it feel it better believe it'
  84. avatar p0d
    [quote:97e82cac57="babyknowsbest"][quote:97e82cac57="p0d"]'I say what what, in the butt'[/quote:97e82cac57]
    Oh Kay?[/quote:97e82cac57]

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbGkxcY7YFU
  85. avatar Mickeycolensoparade
    [quote:6f62fec20d="gl2200"]
    Is there insufficient data for you to even make a wild assed guess at what possible situation could arise between two such people?[/quote:6f62fec20d]

    Well, I would've guessed perhaps there was some sort of romantic involvement between the two, but he was a punk, and she did ballet, it could never work out.
  86. avatar delfuego
    See that fekin Hellogoodbye song 'Here in your arms'. Pure pish. I like where we are, When we drive, in your car and all that. Arrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhh :smt021

    Although I think Entombed win this argument with 'Hey Bitch'.

    Hey bitch, I'm gonna cum in your mouth!
    But if you don't want that, I'll do it anyway
    I remember the times, when I stung it in your fat ass, oh yeah

    Hey you fucking cunt!
    Take it all in your mouth!

    I always liked Carcass lyrics from an educational viewpoint. Where else could you hear about Cadaveric Incubator Of Endoparasites or Swarming Vulgar Mass Of Infected Virulency? I missed half a term of uni as I just listened to Carcass and decided I knew all there to know was about rotting flesh and cadavers.

    And ye can't beat anything by SOD or Lawnmowerdeth. 'The Ballad of Jimi Hendrix' and 'Cobwoman of Deth Meets MrSmellymop'. Classic.

    And finally...

    Anything by Eminem the Wigger Wapper
  87. avatar The enfant terrible
    [quote:e8b192dfbb="Mickeycolensoparade"][quote:e8b192dfbb="gl2200"]
    Is there insufficient data for you to even make a wild assed guess at what possible situation could arise between two such people?[/quote:e8b192dfbb]

    Well, I would've guessed perhaps there was some sort of romantic involvement between the two, but he was a punk, and she did ballet, it could never work out.[/quote:e8b192dfbb]

    Well see, I was a punk and I had a thing with this girl who did ballet but she was a snob from the galgorm road and I lived in Dunclug. I was open and honest about wanting her but because of her snobby friends and family (her dad was called 'Something The Third' or something like that). How Avril found out about it I don't know but that's the gist.
  88. avatar MSB Mastering
    I think there's a difference between bad lyrics by people either claiming to be credible artists or masquerading as such, and a quite unpretentious little pop song like Skater Boy (or however it's spelled). In fact, that song does everything a pop song should. It's catchy, well written and tells a story. That doesn't mean I like the song, merely that it strikes a chord with its target audience. It's put Avril on the map and, if she plays her cards right, she might get to stick around.

    However, if Sting were to come up with such a song (and perform it), I'd be horrified...

    My brother and I were discussing this recently: There's the music business and the entertainment business. Don't confuse the two. So what if Madonna is 50% prerecorded live? I've seen her shows on TV and they're amazing. I never once thought she was an amazing singer, but she's certainly a credible artist.
  89. avatar Mickeycolensoparade
    There ye go then, the song has sent a message of hope across the world.

    To be honest, there are much worse lyrics than that and I suppose for a pop song at least it's being slightly different, rather than the 'oh baby, you make me go crazy' stuff.
  90. avatar delfuego
    Thats a very valid point actually Darrell. There is a world of difference between a lebanese he-she singing about how he could be purple, violet or whatever and some of our so-called 'musical hierarchy' coming out with such pish.

    What I dont understand about our Avril is that now she is married and nearly 23 years of age, WTF is she still singing about teenage angst and boys? Is she now called Avril Whibley?? Not really rock and roll is it? 'Mrs Whibley to the stage please'.
  91. avatar my-angel-rocks
    [quote:31856c9bbe="Mickeycolensoparade"]He was boy, she was a girl
    can I make it any more obvious?

    ..........well yes, you could Avril.

    He was a punk, she did ballet
    What more can I say?

    ...................a lot more..[/quote:31856c9bbe]

    Actually, my main problem with that song is the mixed persons, the final line switches the second person from the girl to the skater boy...annoys me every time. I'm such a loser.
  92. avatar my-angel-rocks
    [quote:e33f8b377b="delfuego"]What I dont understand about our Avril is that now she is married and nearly 23 years of age, WTF is she still singing about teenage angst and boys? Is she now called Avril Whibley?? Not really rock and roll is it? 'Mrs Whibley to the stage please'.[/quote:e33f8b377b]

    You seem to have mixed the reality with the image. Avril Lavigne is a brand. Given that its probably a 40year old guy writing the songs anyway...

    What I don't understand is why her management team haven't got her to ditch her husband yet given his band have gone nowhere and hooked her up with a more hip and happening star
  93. avatar The enfant terrible
    For "credible" artists coming out with pish lyrics see anything by that skinny mutherfucker Chris Martin, boring ass mutherfucker if ever there was one. Another one that gets the whole credibility thing thrown at them is Natasha Bedingfield (credible pop that is) and her lyrics are ripped off from self help manuals and issues of Company and Cosmo Girl that her big brother nicks off her and wanks over the section on G-Spots when there ma goes shopping.
  94. avatar Shane
    [quote:17a1268c9a="The enfant terrible"]For "credible" artists coming out with pish lyrics see anything by that skinny <img src='http://www.fastfude.org/forums/images/smiles/013.gif' /> Chris Martin, boring ass <img src='http://www.fastfude.org/forums/images/smiles/013.gif' /> if ever there was one. Another one that gets the whole credibility thing thrown at them is Natasha Bedingfield (credible pop that is) and her lyrics are ripped off from self help manuals and issues of Company and Cosmo Girl that her big brother nicks off her and <img src='http://www.fastfude.org/forums/images/smiles/104.gif' /> over the section on G-Spots when there ma goes shopping.[/quote:17a1268c9a]

    "These are the words that I myself penned and not a record company songwriter guy who will also be making money from this popular musical release. The words and sentiments that I express are from my heart and nobody else wrote them cause I wrote them all by myself". Original lyrics (which had to be whittled down) to "These Words Are My Own" by Daniel Bedingfield's wife/sister/that's abit of wierd setup isn't it? I gotta get through this...
  95. avatar Mexico
    Walks in to the room
    Feels like a big balloon
    I said "Hey girl, you are beautiful."
    Diet Coke and a pizza please
    Diet Coke I'm on my knees
    Screaming, "Big girl, you are beautiful!"

    Get yourself to the butterfly lounge
    Find yourself a big lady
    Big boy come on around
    And there we're gonna do baby
    No need to fantasize
    Since the words are my phrases
    A watering hole
    With girls all around

    From Mikas new song absolute kek
    Curves in all the right places
  96. avatar Shane
    [quote:87c5e75d0d="Mickeycolensoparade"]He was boy, she was a girl
    can I make it any more obvious?

    ..........well yes, you could Avril.

    He was a punk, she did ballet
    What more can I say?

    ...................a lot more..[/quote:87c5e75d0d]

    Don't be slaggin her off for her earlier work. She was only young. Remember Alanis's bubblegum pop days and that video with Joey outta friends? Then she got all jilted and angry on us with her "Jagged Little Pill" sh!t. Same for Avril. Her newer stuff's SO much more cerebral and emotive. "Hey! Hey! You! You!
    I know that you like me
    No way! No way!
    No it's not a secret
    Hey! Hey! You! You!
    I want to be your girlfriend

    You're so fine
    I want you mine
    You're so delicious
    I think about you all the time
    You're so addictive
    Don't you know what I could do to make you feel alright?"

    Sorry that went on so long...
  97. avatar MSB Mastering
    Don't get me wrong, I'm not an Avril Lavigne fan. The "girlfriend" song is rubbish. Incidentally, if you want to know what happens to an Avril Lavigne song that doesn't make it, go and buy Kelly Clarkson's album.

    I for one don't remember Alanis's bubblegum pop days, but "Jagged Little Pill" is a fantastic album (although it really doesn't sound that great) and it's made given her some credibility.
  98. avatar Shane
    You don't remember it because you aren't CANADIAN. :D Nor am I, but I have cousins and friends in Toronto who LOATHED her when she went all rock because it was so unconvincing in contrast to what she was before. And here's what she was: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_LFnEoG62Q
  99. avatar Shane
    Have to say, I'm laughin out loud at that talky bit in the middle where Joey goes, "Alanis I'm sorry I'm late". And she says "sounds familiar Matt", and the rest...is historical Oscar material. And that James Brown sample - relentless in the background! :lol:
  100. avatar The enfant terrible
    the best damn thing is full of shit and complicated was her best song (it's a fu-cking great pop song).
  101. avatar Shane
    It is.


    Edited for my speaking "thinks" as I often do.
  102. avatar delfuego
    I thought you had forsaken the t'internet Shane?

    Now where is that tape I have knocking around of a certain auburn drummer singing the fantabulous (if thats a word) 'who, what, when, where, WHY?'.

    I wonder if I could put it on you tube (or sex tube) as a soundtrack to some gay porn?
  103. avatar Shane
    Gimmie that tape Paul! You can't disguise your posting mannerisms. And we ROCKED. We was young and full of...sh!t....
  104. avatar Shane
    You forgot "how". And that was Davey Rayner's lyrics. Actually, this is Paul, isn't it? Oh, God help me if it isn't and who has that tape.. Which isn't that bad really.
  105. avatar delfuego
    Ah you are not so slow. I have the very tape in question in my possession ready for the next UNDERLINE gig. Anyway, back to annoying lyrics. That song that likes all the girls, the asian girls, the white girls, the mixed race girls. Give me strength....
  106. avatar i_amannie_b
    [quote:9e99300e99="Shane"]

    Don't be slaggin her off for her earlier work. She was only young. Remember Alanis's bubblegum pop days and that video with Joey outta friends? Then she got all jilted and angry on us with her "Jagged Little Pill" sh!t. Same for Avril. Her newer stuff's SO much more cerebral and emotive. "Hey! Hey! You! You!
    I know that you like me
    No way! No way!
    No it's not a secret
    Hey! Hey! You! You!
    I want to be your girlfriend

    You're so fine
    I want you mine
    You're so delicious
    I think about you all the time
    You're so addictive
    Don't you know what I could do to make you feel alright?"

    Sorry that went on so long...[/quote:9e99300e99]

    But wasn't alanis like, 12?
  107. avatar racecarisracecarbackwards
    Who could forget this timeless classic? (everyone)

    No Way No Way by Vanilla. I seen this on TOTP's years ago and it haunted me.



    Sex feel
    Sex feel
    Sex feel
    Sex feel

    *We're always together never apart
    Sisters through and through
    We're only havin' fun
    To give the boys their run
    We can get a kick out of you, boy

    *Repeat

    Ah, if you tempt with your charms
    Ah, you can hold me in your arms
    Ah, but if you fought yourself on me
    Ah, no no no no no way no way, man-ah mah-ah man-ah

    **No way no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah
    No way no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah
    No way no way,
    No way no way no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah
    No way no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah
    No way no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah
    No way no way, not today

    We share each others' secrets
    Don't take things to heart
    Friendship that will always be true, mmm
    We're lookin' for the guys that can take us to new highs
    Sex feel
    Intelligence too

    *Repeat

    Ah, if you got the genes and think
    Ah, you can buy me with one drink
    Ah, come we're livin' in a dreamworld, boy
    Ah, no no no no no way, no way, man-ah man-ah man-ah

    **Repeat
  108. avatar T Entertainment
    Not for the easily offended -
































    Locally, grindcore superstars Putrefy have a song called 'Slurping on C*ntslop'.

    Probably [i:9440f9c9d6]not[/i:9440f9c9d6] office safe (unless you work in an office in Knockbracken with other sex offenders):

    http://www.putrefy.co.uk/slurpingOnCuntslop.mp3
  109. avatar you_trip_me_up
    My first post!
    "You can take a picture of something you see
    In the future where will I be?
    You can climb a ladder up to the sun
    Or a write a song nobody has sung
    Or do something that's never been done

    Are you lost or incomplete?
    Do you feel like a puzzle, you can't find your missing piece?"

    Incredibly insightful lyrics from Chris Martin

    Don MacLean - American Pie. 8 minutes of nonsense.
    The Doors - The End. Even more than 8 minutes of nonsense
    Not saying I don't like them but just awful lyrics.

    Also anything by the Artic Monkeys and all those other say what you see bands around nowadays.
  110. avatar tinpot anto
    "Nortiness"

    indeed.
    [i:748c07bbc3]
    IIIIiiiiiiii weeeellll tryyyyyyy, to feeex yoooo![/i:748c07bbc3]
  111. avatar Enixs
    [quote:26ef2cc63e="ratherfunkychemicaljunky"]"Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak, [b:26ef2cc63e]somewhere in this town[/b:26ef2cc63e]"

    Not cringeworthy or anything like, but surely common sense would've pointed to the jail.[/quote:26ef2cc63e]

    hahahahahahaha
  112. avatar MSB Mastering
    Although you won't believe me, but before Celine Dion made it big, she was a credible artist. I've got a fantastic album in French called "D'eux" to prove it.

    Here's a wee anecdote about Putrefy: We were recording an album with them. The very rude track list was sitting on a monitor just inside the control room door when a pastor from a church in Lurgan dropped by to borrow a cowbell and saw them. To say he was horrified would be an understatement. I looked at him and said "Jesus would associate with these people" and "Man looks at the outward appearance...". That was that.
  113. avatar Mickeycolensoparade
    Dunno hi, I like the Arctic Monkeys lyrics, I think the delivery is always spot on and they don't seem pretentious with them, unlike other bands who like to use the whole social observation thing as a source of inspiration. I suppose the arguement for that style of lyric is that it could be what comes natural to the writer, they would rather write that than some of the bland stuff that has been posted up here as bad lyrics, y'know....

    but then again, kaiser chiefs shit all over that with 'Everything is average nowadays' :|
  114. avatar nocturn
    cant be bothered looking through 8 pages of posts to see if its here but:

    "...he thinks im a cabbage, because i hate university challenge..."

    (Undertones, my perfect cousin)
  115. avatar Aine Knees
    Well, when I was at school my bro was in a band called Fringe... They had a song called Perfect Sense... me, him and my sis were just laughing about this the other day, it is very teenage

    You make perfect sense to me
    Your eyes are like flowers
    I long to make love to you
    We would do it for hours

    You make perfect sense to me
    I make perfect sense to you
    You long to have me baby
    But I'm far too f**king good for you


    There were a couple of good ones by an early incarnation of the Skinflints too...
    There was one which contained this lyric:
    "I'm a rocket-ship, gonna punch a hole in your ozone layer! Ozone.... ozone unfriendly! Ozone.... ozone unfriendly!"
    and then there was Urban Vampire, the only bit I remember is: "She's gotta be blonde and her neck must be juicy".

    Oh yeah and then there's Teen Rebel! This is by my imaginary dodgy rock band, Bad Poetry.

    Drinking beer down the Broadmeadow
    Shootin' pool in the Bush Arcade
    Skivin’ school to meet my rocker boyfriend
    Oh yeah we thought we had it made

    Teen Rebel! Smokin spliffs after school -
    Teen Rebel! Breakin all the rules -
    Teen Rebel! - they didn't understand -
    Teen Rebel!- so now I'm in this dodgy rock band!

    Black cherry kisses in DM boots
    Spasm dance in the Cathedral Hall
    Downin' vodka in the car park
    Snakebite vomit up the Mart Wall.

    Teen Rebel! Smokin spliffs after school -
    Teen Rebel! Breakin all the rules -
    Teen Rebel! - they didn't understand -
    Teen Rebel!- so now I'm in this dodgy rock band!

    Sneakin out the window to my boyfriend's flat
    Watchin Raw Power at 3am
    Daddy finds I'm gone he's gonna kick my ass
    Oh no I'm in sh*t again!

    Teen Rebel! Smokin spliffs after school -
    Teen Rebel! Breakin all the rules -
    Teen Rebel! - they didn't understand -
    Teen Rebel!- so now I'm in this dodgy rock band!

    Hopefully if Bad Poetry ever get together we'll also do "Bad Girls" by Danny Todd

    Bad Girls! Get what they want when they wanna.... so they do!
    I said, bad girls! - get what they want all the ti-i-i-ime (Bad girls!)
    I said bad girls! - get what they want when they wanna... so they do!
    I said, Bad girls... running though the ni--ight!

    Bad girls - run around now!
    Bad girls - all over town now...
    etc etc etc
  116. avatar gl2200
    [quote:c7c6c234a8="Aine Knees"]
    Oh yeah and then there's Teen Rebel! This is by my imaginary dodgy rock band, Bad Poetry.

    Drinking beer down the Broadmeadow
    Shootin' pool in the Bush Arcade
    Skivin’ school to meet my rocker boyfriend
    Oh yeah we thought we had it made

    Teen Rebel! Smokin spliffs after school -
    Teen Rebel! Breakin all the rules -
    Teen Rebel! - they didn't understand -
    Teen Rebel!- so now I'm in this dodgy rock band!

    ...[/quote:c7c6c234a8]

    You are Rebels Of The Flesh, and I claim my five pounds.
  117. avatar Farnsworth
    The worst lyrics ever are the lyrics to "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls but if we are talking about real lyricists who have written bad lyrics out-of-character then check out these bad boys by prog lyricist supremo Neil Peart of Rush.

    "Dog Years"

    In a dogs eyes,
    A year is really more like seven.
    And all too soon,
    A canine will be chasing cars in doggy heaven

    This part of the song is often misheard as;

    In a dog's hide,
    A smear is really more like heaven,
    Vidal sassoon,
    A canine will be chasing farts in doggy heaven

    I know which ones I like best!
  118. avatar Aine Knees
    oh yes I remembered the worst stuff I've heard now.... also the worst name! This was a girl-band in York, they were supporting Corrigan once, and they were really nice girls... I think it was their first gig so hopefully they since then have changed their name and written some slightly better lyrics. They were called "Brutal Tinkerbell" and their lyrics... sung in a very posh accent:

    He's a nightmare
    The worst kind
    He's a sh*thead
    But I'm fine

    Not quite as funny just written down, because the delivery was hilarious.

    I just looked up Rebels of the Flesh, yes it looks very like what I imagine Bad Poetry would look like if they existed. (infortunately I haven't fixed the sound on the pc so I can't listen to anything). Maybe Danny should sell them the rights to "Bad Girls" lol
  119. avatar Rosemary St Books
    [quote:a4687c3d0a="MSB Mastering"]"If I stay there will be trouble
    If I go it will be double..."

    Seems like an easy choice to me...[/quote:a4687c3d0a]

    Ahh, but as was pointed out in 'Viz' many moons ago, The Clash, being on the punk scene, may have been relishing the prospect of 'trouble'. Not such an easy choice as it appears on the surface :-)